Humor

THE EMPEROR’S JADEby Robert Mitchell

For over two thousand years the secret hiding place of the jade dragon seal of Qin Shi Huang, the first emperor of China, has been just that – a secret. But the accidental destruction of a small ancient porcelain pillow reveals that secret, and leads the young Australian teacher and his Scottish friend away from their peaceful college at Nandaihe on the shore of the Bo Sea, drawing them up into the freezing bleakness of the jagged mountains of Huangshan, as they try to outwit and elude those who would steal their secret, the jade seal, and their lives.

The United States Of Vinland: The Landing (The Markland Settlement Saga Book 1)by Colin Taber

What if?

What if the descendants of the Vikings who settled Greenland and went on to reach North America around the end of the first millennium had stayed?

Five hundred years later, would Christopher Columbus have arrived to the south of an eastern seaboard dotted with centuries old settlements and towns hosting devotees to Thor and Odin?

Might the Norse have gone on to build a nation as dominant as the United States of our own world?

A thousand years after reaching Greenland, Vinland and Markland, would we still have had two world wars? What might the world look like? Where might the political and religious divides be drawn?

Welcome to Norse America.

At the turn of the first millennium:

Eskil, orphaned in war, but now a man, is leading his followers to found a settlement dedicated to Asgard’s gods in the newly discovered lands in the west. There, after tests, adventures and challenges, he will leave a legacy that will grow to become the strongest nation the world has ever seen.

The Landing is the first book in The United States of Vinland series and is an alternate history that begins the saga with the establishment of the first Markland halls.

Join us as we rewrite 1000 years of history.

PopCoby Scarlett Thomas

“The code-breaking and -making heroine of [this] smart, engaging novel takes a critical view of the corporate marketing of cool . . . a captivating heroine.” —Publishers Weekly

Twentysomething Alice Butler is a bit of an introvert, but it hasn’t stopped her from landing a job at the UK office of globally successful—if slightly sinister—toy company PopCo. There’s no dress code, but that doesn’t keep Alice’s coworkers from commenting on her “Bletchley Park look” outfits. Now the CEO wants the creatives on the staff to attend what the organization calls “Thought Camp” and invent an insidious product that will part as many teenage girls from their allowances as possible. Alice isn’t feeling so comfortable about her supposedly cool new job. But she has another problem to solve first.

She’s started to receive bizarre encrypted messages, and they may have something to do with her cryptanalyst grandfather; her long-disappeared father; a centuries-old manuscript; and the possibility of buried treasure. Alice is convinced the engraving on the necklace she’s been wearing since she was ten years old holds the key to it all. But the secrets she uncovers may take her by surprise, in this highly original novel that blends code, mathematics, marketing, mystery, and more, “a sort of Harriet-the-Spy-meets-Douglas-Coupland with a Treasure Island twist” (Daily Candy).

“How many novels can you think of that leave the reader with an intriguing puzzle to solve, plus a cake recipe, plus a crossword and a list of the first thousand prime numbers? Clever, likeable, frothy, zeitgeist-chasing.” —Time Out London

Bill The Vampire (The Tome of Bill Book 1)by Rick Gualtieri

There are reasons we fear the night. He’s NOT one of them.

Bill Ryder was a dateless geek, but then he met a girl to die for. So he did. Sadly, that was just the beginning of his troubles. He awoke as a vampire but, fangs or not, he was still at the bottom of the food chain.

Now he finds himself surrounded by creatures stronger, deadlier, and a hell of a lot cooler than he is … and they all want to kick his ass.

Bill isn’t exactly average, though. A vamp like him hasn’t been seen in centuries. He’s got a few tricks up his sleeve, unlikely allies, and an attitude that makes him too damned obnoxious to quit.

Join him in this hilarious tale of bloodthirsty monsters and the unlikely hero who’s not afraid to flip them all off, even if it gets him killed – again.

Done With Being Fatby T.C. Hale

DONE WITH BEING FAT is brought to you by touring comedian turned natural health expert, T.C. Hale (aka Tony Hale). Not only will Tony have you laughing out loud while he reveals the secrets behind weight loss and how the human body functions, you will also learn how to look at your own body chemistry to understand the underlying cause of YOUR weight issues. Since the reasons for weight gain vary from person to person, once you understand what is going on with your chemistry, this book will help you understand what foods, supplements, or lifestyle changes could eliminate your need to continue buying bigger pants.

This book is the straightforward version of the laugh out loud, KICK YOUR FAT IN THE NUTS. Both versions explain the science behind menstrual cramps. The version you choose to read is just a matter of taste.

The Thought Readers (Mind Dimensions Book 1)by Dima Zales

A new series about mind readers from a New York Times and USA Today bestselling author

Everyone thinks I’m a genius.

Everyone is wrong.

Sure, I finished Harvard at eighteen and now make crazy money at a hedge fund. But that’s not because I’m unusually smart or hard-working.

It’s because I cheat.

You see, I have a unique ability. I can go outside time into my own personal version of reality–the place I call “the Quiet”–where I can explore my surroundings while the rest of the world stands still.

I thought I was the only one who could do this–until I met her.

My name is Darren, and this is how I became entangled with all the Russians and learned that I’m a Reader.

Julia’s Gifts (Great War Great Love #1)by Ellen Gable

“Outstanding and unforgettable book!” Jean Heimann, author

Religious Fiction. As a young girl, Julia began buying gifts for her future spouse, a man whose likeness and personality she has conjured up in her mind, a man she calls her “beloved.” Soon after the United States enters the Great War, Julia impulsively volunteers as a medical aid worker, with no experience or training. Disheartened by the realities of war, will Julia abandon the pursuit of her beloved? Will her naïve ‘gift scheme’ distract her from recognizing her true “Great Love?” From Philadelphia to war-torn France, follow Julia as she transitions from unworldly young woman to compassionate volunteer.

“Touching story of faith and devotion that is sure to leave a lasting impression.” Therese Heckenkamp, award-winning author

“Filled with fascinating historical detail and a reminder that love never fails and that miracles – great and small – happen all around us.” Carolyn Astfalk, award-winning author

“Touched my heart in many ways.” Theresa Linden, award-winning author

“A romantic drama that unfolds far from home–but takes us to the heart of home along the way.” A.K. Frailey, author

“Outstanding and unforgettable book.” Jean Heimann, author, Fatima: The Apparition that Changed the World

Queen of the Universeby Geralyn Corcillo

Meet Arlen Black, the hero voted Best Book Boyfriend by Chick Lit Chat HQ…
TV writer extraordinaire Lola Scott is about to lose her show because she still hasn’t cast the role of the dark, brooding bounty hunter. But then HE walks in … Arlen Black, and he’s perfect for the part. One problem. He’s not an actor there to audition. Nope. He’s the handyman Lola hired to fix her house. And he wants nothing to do with Lola and her show.

But Lola doesn’t give up. As she draws Arlen into her zany world of TV production, Hollywood gossip sinks its claws into him. When one paparazzi photo threatens to destroy everything he holds dear, Lola’s got to move heaven and Earth not to save the show … but to save Arlen.

This stand-alone novel is the second romantic comedy in the In Love in the Limelight series.

Disempowered No More : A Spiritual Journey to Discovering Purpose, Power, & Passion After Divorceby Simone Allison

In the book Disempowered No More: A Spiritual Journey to Discovering Power, Passion, & Purpose After Divorce, the author engages with the reader in an intimate chronicling of Divinely chartered events, following the simultaneous diagnosis, year long battle, and passing of her father as well as the fragmentation of a 17-year long co-dependent & narcissistic marriage. She shares her journey, rife with pain, anger, and disappointment following her tumultuous separation, which led to a search for compassion, understanding, and forgiveness. It is a story of an unexpected but highly anticipated and yearned for spiritual awakening. It demonstrates the untapped strength within us all and how relationship with Our Creator, our team of angels, and our own sheer will to overcome the obstacles we face, can inevitably lead to a life path that is transformative, passion-filled, and purpose driven.

Prosperous Christian: 10 Commandments of Godly Prosperityby Edward C. Hill

This masterful book was written especially for those Christian entrepreneurs, professionals and consultants who are looking for a life that is more abundant, which God promises in John 10:10. It is filled with hundreds of scriptures that give concrete, definitive, Godly instruction on how to be more prosperous in all categories of life; physical, mental spiritual, professional, social, familial and financial.

“Prosperous Christian” takes you on a deep dive into the ten commandments that are essential to have true Godly abundance and prosperity. In addition, it gives supporting teachings on our competition, conflicting scriptures, and even the dangers of financial prosperity.

You’ll learn the truth about:
• God’s definition of prosperity
• Does God want His children to be prosperous?
• How to unlock the truths in the Bible
• How to pray effectively
• The most dynamic and powerful law of God
• How God works in the workplace
• What God says about the rich
• And more!

Each of the ten commandments is illustrated by remarkable real-life stories, thought-provoking questions, and strategic real-world action steps you can implement right now.

Impactful teachings you’ll find in this book:

•God’s definition of prosperity (pg. 7-11)
•Meaning of life (pg. 12)
•5 Godly motives for prosperity (pg. 13)
•Exactly what God thinks of His children (pg. 24-29
•Money as a tool (pg. 40)
•Satan’s meeting (pg. 45)
•Our wrestling match (pg. 50)
•The devil’s only objectives (pg. 53)
•How exactly does the adversary endeavor to defeat Christians (pg. 58)
•Keys to Biblical research (pg. 63)
•History of the complete English Bible (pg. 68)
•God’s Biblical time table, the seven administrations: (pg. 76)
•Can a camel go through the eye of a needle? (pg. 86)
•God’s disciples who were wealthy (pg. 92)
•Financial status of Jesus (pg. 99)
•Your state versus your standing (pg. 102)
•What exactly is sin (pg. 107)
•Unanswered prayer (pg. 116)
•The exact outline for prayer (pg. 126)
•The most dynamic and powerful law of God (pg. 133-135)
•Process simulation conditioning (positive-believing action) (pg. 142)
•What Enthusiasm really means (pg. 151)
•Retirement (pg. 156)
•How God segments humans (pg. 165)
•How we can be five times more effective, guaranteed (pg. 167)
•The only thing in the entire Bible God asks us to prove Him (pg. 183)
•The difference between tithes, alms and offerings (pg. 195)
•The upward spiral of giving (pg. 198)
•The conundrum of bacon of eggs (pg. 205)
•There is no status quo (pg. 205)
•Free resources for further study (pg. 207)
•Two types of knowledge (pg. 207)

Notable quotes from the book:
“Having wealth doesn’t change you, it exposes you. Some people truly cannot handle a major influx of money. It would bring out the worst in them.”

“These teachers are sincere, but sincerity means only that they are sincere. It doesn’t mean they have rightly divided the Word of Truth. You can pretty much get the Word of God to say whatever you want, if you torture His words long enough.”

“GET YOUR MIND ALIGNED WITH THE DIVINE!”

“Doubt, worry and fear is a conversation you have with yourself about the things you cannot change. Prayer is a conversation you have with God about things He can change.”

“Pious words and seemingly impressive deeds mean nothing if a person is not living a godly life and following the example of Jesus Christ! That’s why we should be extremely particular about whom we give our time to and whom we hang out with.”

“Abundance, possessions, and achievements, without God, are like an unsharpened pencil; they have no point.”