When my claustrophobic sister Julie Ann and her down-in-the-back husband Jody were trapped on a stalled elevator in a posh hotel, they were not alone in their distress. Two young male execs were with them. As soon as the elevator lurched heart-stoppingly close to a place near a floor level, the two young men were able to wedge open the elevator door just enough to squeeze up and through. The two executives escaped, leaving behind my sister– a grandmother– and her husband Jody, her hero.
I heard later from my sister that, “Jody couldn’t believe his eyes–two young men leaving me behind! But my Jody, with his back hurting, pushed me up and out through the tight elevator doors and then he pulled himself up and out. Once we were out of there, Jody put me in a chair and said, ‘Sit tight. I’m gonna get you a biscuit and a cup of coffee.’”He did–her hero with the bad back.
Our hero, too. For that single story of Jody’s faithful care and resilience is not the only story of his heroism that pervades family life. Like most heroic men, he endures, and the stories of his endurance are like other family’s fathers and men who take care of their families and of family business.Family lore captures the stories of all kinds of men and fathers who are inherently, because of their very nature and integrity, daily heroes.
Most families have a story they treasure but keep to themselves about the man in the family who is a hero and what he did that earns him that label.Often, he has not pulled someone from a stalled elevator or saved children from a burning orphanage. His actions are frequently, routinely much more ordinary, heroic feats camouflaged in the daily routine of making a good life with the people he loves more than himself. Being this kind of hero doesn’t have much to do with bringing anyone flowers or taking out the trash without being asked. The truly heroic men simply put the safety and comfort of others before their own safety and comfort, are alert to ways to protect and care for the people around them, and will do whatever is necessary however they are personally feeling to fulfill their self-appointed mission of protecting the home place and the people who trust him to do just that.They are extraordinary, ordinary men.
While they are unforgettable, their stories don’t get told very often. But I’ll tell you a powerful secret. When a woman experiences the tender mercies of a man like that, she never quite gets over it.As I approach Father’s Day this year, I think of all these men–and my own father– and especially of Jody who rescued my sister from the trapped elevator car and of what she said afterwards: “My Jody couldn’t believe it—how those two younger men could leave the elevator with a lady still trapped on board. Those two young men in their business suits never looked back. After my Jody got us out of there, he never left my side.”Jody is her husband, but my sister knew what kind of man he is because she was raised by another extraordinary,